Tuesday 28 July 2009

I Must Be 29% Lesbian Then

This week I let the Stockholm Pride website analyse my Twitter stream which showed I'm 71% straight. Just a bit of a fun diversion in what has, all told its been a tiring, emotional and stressful end to last week. An unhappy collision of work, my lingering gd (see whitterings past) and I guess other mental health difficulties, along with events leave me wanting to curl up and hide in a big box where I can happily sleep until September comes.

There are some people who make it worse, in short the arrogance, rudeness and stubbornness of certain people got to me when most of the time it wouldn't. When the going gets tough, the not so tough get some own label Baileys (not great for the figure I know but this was an emergency) and randomly play my favourite songs.

And to top it all I learn Starbucks are going stealth in their war to get everyone downing their brews by trialling shops branded as independent local cafes in the US. So their brand must be so devalued recently, they are resorting to trickery in their campaign for world domination. Although the anti-brand snob must be secretly delighted.

To carry on recent themes, I have had a continuing problem over my self image, the sexual organ can be hidden away and can be for most of the time forgotten about. The face is different it is the thing which, er, faces you. I can wish someday and somehow the problem reconciles itself.

The other recent thought being the gender binary and my place on it. I've thought the best way to express this is to use a scale ranging from 1 to 11. One being very female and eleven being Chuck Norris (who of course does not sleep, he waits). I guess I am somewhere in the middle hoping to claw my way down.

I will write about the experiences the week before last as there will be a beginning, middle and end although to quote the film maker Jean-Luc Godard "not necessarily in that order". Its been an aim to get back to updating the blog at least once a week and this way I have a subject. Till then...

Wednesday 22 July 2009

A Blogger Blogging About Blogging

This blog has survived past the 2nd anniversary which in blog years makes this site about 41, it goes through peaks and troughs, much like its author really. This as the title suggests is about blogs.

There is often potentially nothing as buttock clinchingly tedious as a blogger blogging about blogs along with the risk of being a little self congratulatory. I recognise this, however about once a year a article will appear proclaiming the end of blogging claiming the latest web 2.0 site is the blog killer and trotting a litany of complaints copied and pasted from last years article.

Recycling articles is commonplace in magazines from the same summer beauty tips article to the NME printing the recreate Glastonbury in your home by putting a 14 television at the end your garden covering it with rubbish and blocking your toilet, every year when I read it.

The rationale goes something like this; trendy site of the moment is rendering the form irrelevant and that people can't concentrate beyond a sentence or two an assumption common in many sections of the media. Ideas sometimes need to expanded beyond a simple statement with arguments supporting and maybe acknowledging faults and limitations. A blog is a good place where this can be done. Regarding accusations of spam, you choose to visit a site it doesn't appear on your browser unsolicited you choose to visit or subscribe or to leave a very intelligent comment.

Many will gravitate to TwitFaceTube sites but others will use them alongside blogging as there is a niche for this form of writing that will never go.

Tuesday 14 July 2009

The Evil Bride Writes

A hotch-potch of personal updates and general thoughts. Some things have set me thinking about the assumptions which take place within or between many or all the trans communities and how they maybe need to be questioned. Though at the moment its more personal questions which worry me.

Stretch limousines are are quite noticeable on the streets at the moment, I presume for end of term parties and proms. These things are top of the list of things people think are classy but are not above buying your food at M&S and Ferrero Rocher chocolates (they are revolting nuggets of overpriced, misleadingly marketed yuck). The thing to say about the prom dresses I've seen advertised and the photos printed in the yokel paper is that I would choose them but as bride to be in major evil mode picking out the worst colours possible for my bridesmaids to wear. Because despite being way prettier THERE IS NO WAY THEY ARE UPSTAGING ME.

My life has been a little unexciting recently there has been nothing spectacular. Apart from a trip to visit my mother, I really haven't been anywhere. I could go into town but the local town centre is not the most friendly especially at the weekend and frankly looks a bit skanky and boorish at the best of times. That is would I if it was attractive.

The past few days nothing has felt or looked right I just don't see who I want to see and just see (I'm aware I'm overdoing the sees here) a masculine face. Well durrrrh you might say and you'd be right, doesn't make it any less frustrating and undermined my recent coping strategies, although using a word like "strategies" may lead you to believe that I have a some well thought out masterplan other than something I just thought up to cope. Ultimately I'm someone who doesn't feel at home in the male gender or welcome as a female and is trying to seek temporary asylum in a friendly neutral territory.

As such there also have not been any photo updates, a confession I'm sure will start the process of me being drummed out the tranny union or at least a stern talking to.

Monday 6 July 2009

The Guilty Pleasure

On many peoples mp3 player (or music playing device) there are often a few tracks that you would rather the world did not know you listened to. Unfortunately these things have a way of getting out. Perhaps your soundproof earphones are not that insulated and the rest of the bus now knows that you listened to B*witched or Bad Boys Inc.

All are that persons deeply held musical taste which they have often taken the time to rip and copy to their mp3 iJukebox thingy. What I do dislike is being sneering or ironic about it (especially those awful "ironic" cover versions that bands do on the Jo Wiley show), describing it as a guilty pleasure. It is used to legitimise poor works or as an apology for liking unfashionable works. The phrase pops up frequently on Lastfm among many other lazy or poor tags (.

If you like it you like it you shouldn't have to coat it layers of irony and pretend its really bad. The choice of music is a deeply personal thing, the statistics on my own player have the kind of bands certain Radio 1 dj's claim give you good taste and those which don't.

I would like to see under my totalitarian rule the phrase "guilty pleasure" banned (along with "journey"). Something is merely a pleasure or not. We can all name several films that are well made and beautifully crafted but we'll all get loads more fun watching George Of The Jungle (watch out for that tree!).