Tuesday 22 February 2011

Meet Jet

Meet Jet. He's a rough and ready go-getting type of guy. Jet by name and Jet by nature, smooth and self assured, he with his good hair and designer stubble. He'll take credit for good ideas his minions came up with. He'll talk about 360 degree synergistic strategies. He'll list his strengths ending with making lurrrve at which point there'll be some god-awful boast about his penis-fencing prowess.

Yes I hate him as well.

Ask me to list my strengths and I'll um and er my weaknesses are quicker to mind and I could go on and on to the extent of making myself sound like a totally hopeless case. Its probably my fear of appearing to be bragging, a degree of modesty, some shyness and total dislike of any form of public speaking which holds me back.

There are some things, heck bugger modesty there are many things I am not just good at I'm bloody brilliant at them and I don't have to resort to using meaningless buzz words either.

Modesty is a great, almost laudable trait though there's a time and a place. If you don't promote yourself then chances are unless you've the budget for PR (even then the best promoter of yourself is almost always yourself) nobody will do it for you. If you don't knob heads like Jet will run the world.

Friday 4 February 2011

Just A Bit Of Banter

Oh my word! I seem to have been transported back several decades to some office and I'm a secretary and that must be my boss.

SMACK!


He knows I love a playful pat on the bum really.

GIGGLES.

Sorry about that. Thankfully we are past the time when being a bit of a sexist dick can be dismissed as banter or playfulness. The fuss over Gray and Keys being two total twonks has abated, the anonymous Youtube poster with their job done disappears. Though it wasn't surprising that Sky had tolerated such outrageous behaviour when a just a few years ago they were advertising their sports news shows by how attractive their female presenters were.


Had a look on the recently released crime map which revealed that I live in a slightly dull area and my local PCSO has a magnificent moustache. It also revealed, and you might want to be prepared for this revelation, that the area where all the pubs and clubs are had a few incidents. So all in all money well spent because I never would have known that. What it didn't display was any context or detail, the uninitiated observer might just think it a total danger zone whereas its fine outside of a Friday or Saturday night.

BUZZZZZ

Oh I'll have to stop now the boss wants me to step into his office and take down some particulars.