Five Year Plan

Time for the bloody-hell-have-I-really-had-a-blog-for-that-long moment when I realise I started this blog five years ago. There's better advice out there on how to build audiences, attract advertising and so on. The only slight gasp of wisdom I'd give is that you should take time to find your voice and be authentic. Also don't play around with the layout so much that you disable comments for the first 6 months.

Hardly Yoda like wisdom I know, anyway, enjoy the sport but if you don't there's always BBC 4, the Food channel or listen to some Spice Girls and admit to yourself that they recorded some really good pop songs.

Femfresh and That Icky Area

"Mini, twinkle, hoo haa, flower, fancy, yoni,
lady garden...
Did you know that regular shower gels and soaps, if used on your privates, can strip it of its natural defences causing dryness and irritation?
With its pH-balanced formula specially developed for intimate skin, femfresh is the kindest way to care for your va jay jay, kitty, nooni, la la, froo froo!"

Femfresh has been under social media attack from feminists some justified others not.

Labelled as a feminine hygiene brand designed to clean that horribly icky evil area known as the vagina. As we all know the best way to cleanse that area is with fire but some slightly sensitive souls consider that a little painful. We should ignore those considered people who have studied the area say that while it may be of use to very niche segment you don't need such products, mild soap and water is sufficient. Further they may cause damage but hey what do the NHS know? Especially when there's a happy woman in the advertising with copy saying you need this to deal with your bad part.

As I've said before it is an invented want, much like sports drinks they have their niche for a tiny number but are not helpful for the rest of us.

As for objecting to euphemisms, its an advertising campaign not your gynaecologist and the intention was to be light hearted even if the impression I get is jaw dropping cringe making. Yes some can be a bit ropey but some for all private parts can be fun and display the inventiveness of language.

The River Lambourn - Before During After

The River Lambourn (which runs from Upper Lambourn to Newbury, where it joins the Kennet) before, during and after the drought from roughly the same spot. As you can see the waters clearer and fresher and underlines despite all the complaints, how much the rain was needed.

The dog at the top is my folks who will happily leap into any bit of water no matter how dirty and muddy and will leap at you with the enthusiasm of a small puppy and the force of a small car.

There are more pictures on the Environment Agency's Flickr page.

Depressing Village Centres

Months ago I got lost in the maze of new housing, Google maps being no help still believing I was the area was still fields and I was stood in the middle. A lot of new estates have a similar lay out including the "village centre" comprising of a pub, church, estate agent, takeaway place, hairdresser and a shop, almost always a Tesco. For a bit of variety I could walk to the next estate and.. oh. It is an almost depressing uniformity and lack of variety. There are 11 Tesco stores in the Swindon area only one being a "Extra" supermarket. Throw in the wholly owned One Stop subsidiary stores and its a worrying dominance especially in the convenience store market. Even more so when you realise they are not very good supermarkets, every one has a sterile industrial nature feeling like a profit centre wrung for every penny. No wonder customers are starting to turn away.